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LAGNIAPPE: The Shower Cap Blog
LAGNIAPPE: The Shower Cap Blog
By B.See
5 Jan 2022 7:34 am in Liberals Only Political Chat Room
19 Feb 2022 7:10 am
Again?
Right..
In memory of Pumpkins
26 Feb 2022 4:49 am
This week's Shower Cap Blog:
Knockoff Hitler Gets His War, and Other Unmitigated **** - Shower Cap Blog
excerpts:
"Y’know, my greatest hope is that the need for this blog will fade with time, that the madness dies down, and the billions of humans who just want to get through this damn life with minimal **** will no longer be subject to the insane whims of the **** people on the planet,"
[you and me both, Cap]
"but here we are in a week of headlines about Putin seizing Chernobyl while supply chain issues disrupt the gravestone industry, and, well, “today is not that day.”
Yeah, the ghastly bastard went and did it; Pooty-Poot launched his vile, illegal war of aggression on neighboring Ukraine. Guess his discount Bond villain *** couldn’t bear the thought of never going Full Hitler, even once.
See, Putkins had this great big plan worked out, a masterpiece of modern gaslighting, to justify invasion by staging a false flag attack, like Ukraine randomly decided to initiate hostilities with the massive military force he’d assembled outside their borders, for Super Real Reasons. Sure, Jan.
Anyway, Old Tricksy Joe basically just posted that **** on the internet for the entire class to see, alongside the Kremlin’s planned war crimes n’ political assassinations. Caught with his pants down, the best this “master spy” could muster was an unhinged, deeply unmanful rant, where he came off like a drunken ex-boyfriend, vowing to chop down the front door with an axe to get his Whitesnake t-shirt back.
Of course Kid Kompromat sided with Russian aggression immediately and enthusiastically, grateful for the chance to kiss his boss’ *** in public. And you know Tucker Carlson’s always ready to pour another spoonful of pro-Putin poison down his congregation’s gullet.
Hell, seems the entire evangelical Right can’t stop talking about how much they share Vlad's values... which are, again, pro-Killing a Bunch of People and Taking All Their Stuff.
Knockoff Hitler Gets His War, and Other Unmitigated **** - Shower Cap Blog
excerpts:
"Y’know, my greatest hope is that the need for this blog will fade with time, that the madness dies down, and the billions of humans who just want to get through this damn life with minimal **** will no longer be subject to the insane whims of the **** people on the planet,"
[you and me both, Cap]
"but here we are in a week of headlines about Putin seizing Chernobyl while supply chain issues disrupt the gravestone industry, and, well, “today is not that day.”
Yeah, the ghastly bastard went and did it; Pooty-Poot launched his vile, illegal war of aggression on neighboring Ukraine. Guess his discount Bond villain *** couldn’t bear the thought of never going Full Hitler, even once.
See, Putkins had this great big plan worked out, a masterpiece of modern gaslighting, to justify invasion by staging a false flag attack, like Ukraine randomly decided to initiate hostilities with the massive military force he’d assembled outside their borders, for Super Real Reasons. Sure, Jan.
Anyway, Old Tricksy Joe basically just posted that **** on the internet for the entire class to see, alongside the Kremlin’s planned war crimes n’ political assassinations. Caught with his pants down, the best this “master spy” could muster was an unhinged, deeply unmanful rant, where he came off like a drunken ex-boyfriend, vowing to chop down the front door with an axe to get his Whitesnake t-shirt back.
Of course Kid Kompromat sided with Russian aggression immediately and enthusiastically, grateful for the chance to kiss his boss’ *** in public. And you know Tucker Carlson’s always ready to pour another spoonful of pro-Putin poison down his congregation’s gullet.
Hell, seems the entire evangelical Right can’t stop talking about how much they share Vlad's values... which are, again, pro-Killing a Bunch of People and Taking All Their Stuff.
26 Feb 2022 5:00 am
CONTINUED FROM ABOVE:
I fear the Canadian trucker convoy finally arrived at its inevitable destination, in whichever corner of history’s trash heap contains the lottery tickets and wrestling magazines, as Justin Trudeau tyrannically refused to rewrite public health policy to suit the misconceptions of a handful of tantrum-throwing asshats.
Still, the insurrection-hungry mega-donors of ascendant American fascism are rolling out the astroturf for every braying nitwit who claims he can get a convoy going. So far, efforts have been good n’ laughable, but there’s certainly plenty of money lining up to finance a big budget sequel to the Capitol Riot.
Texas Governor Greg Abbott spun the Wheel of Hate, and when the needle landed on “transgender children and their parents,” he asked himself, “what would the Taliban do?” and then he did just that.
I don’t know what to even say about these bastards anymore…all they’re interested in is hurting people."
Ain't it the truth, Cap. AIN'T IT THE TRUTH.
I fear the Canadian trucker convoy finally arrived at its inevitable destination, in whichever corner of history’s trash heap contains the lottery tickets and wrestling magazines, as Justin Trudeau tyrannically refused to rewrite public health policy to suit the misconceptions of a handful of tantrum-throwing asshats.
Still, the insurrection-hungry mega-donors of ascendant American fascism are rolling out the astroturf for every braying nitwit who claims he can get a convoy going. So far, efforts have been good n’ laughable, but there’s certainly plenty of money lining up to finance a big budget sequel to the Capitol Riot.
Texas Governor Greg Abbott spun the Wheel of Hate, and when the needle landed on “transgender children and their parents,” he asked himself, “what would the Taliban do?” and then he did just that.
I don’t know what to even say about these bastards anymore…all they’re interested in is hurting people."
Ain't it the truth, Cap. AIN'T IT THE TRUTH.
26 Feb 2022 5:13 am
Jantje_Smit » 31 Jan 2022, 9:29 am » wrote: ↑ So, are you BV's sok.... that would explain things... like why no one gives a ****.....
I don't think B.See is BV.....BV's a dickhead.....B.See is more of a cocksucker than anything else. There is a chance you could be right tho since BV has never had a real live girlfriend and has admitted to developing the cocksucker skill set
26 Feb 2022 6:25 am
Post your number, Naffy..nefarious101 » 26 Feb 2022, 6:13 am » wrote: ↑ I don't think B.See is BV.....BV's a dickhead.....B.See is more of a cocksucker than anything else. There is a chance you could be right tho since BV has never had a real live girlfriend and has admitted to developing the cocksucker skill set
6 Mar 2022 3:19 am
You're right. I've never had a real live girlfriend. And according to ohm and others here I'm only a kid, so what the **** would I know about anything ANYWAY.nefarious101 » 26 Feb 2022, 6:13 am » wrote: ↑ I don't think B.See is BV.....BV's a dickhead.....B.See is more of a cocksucker than anything else. There is a chance you could be right tho since BV has never had a real live girlfriend and has admitted to developing the cocksucker skill set
6 Mar 2022 3:24 am
This week's Shower Cap Blog has OODLES to unpack, but I'm only posting a wee bit of it. So BUCKLE UP kiddies. Sit back and enjoy:
Hitler, But Dumber: The Vladimir Putin Story - Shower Cap Blog
I have never watched anybody **** up anything as especially and as completely as Vladimir Putin **** up his disgusting little war. Suddenly, Trump’s an amateur. Trump is a cave painting, this is the Sistine Chapel of **** up.
What an evil, stupid, little man. To launch a bloody war of aggression, upon a neighbor, for vanity and petty greed, and based on an utterly delusional appraisal of…Jesus, of everything, every single aspect of this morass, the conceited ghoul.
A most definitely incomplete list of Things and People Chessmaster Poot-Poot Disastrously Underestimated: Biden, Zelenksy, NATO, pretty much every single Ukrainian, Zelensky, How Hard War Is Generally, Western unity, Zelensky, Zelensky, Zelensky, and Zelensky.
Stripped, by Wily Joe Biden, of the capacity to justify military aggression with a false flag attack, the best narrative the master manipulator could muster was some feeble sputtering about “de-Nazification,” like a paint-covered kindergartner blaming the dog for the crude treasure map that appeared on the living room carpet.
But the dictator handbook says the bigger the lie, the harder you have to stick to it, so Comrade **** is still trying to gaslight Macron into accepting him as Indiana Jones, socking fascists in the jaw, rather than a crazy old man, working through a war crimes bucket list.
continued below...
Hitler, But Dumber: The Vladimir Putin Story - Shower Cap Blog
I have never watched anybody **** up anything as especially and as completely as Vladimir Putin **** up his disgusting little war. Suddenly, Trump’s an amateur. Trump is a cave painting, this is the Sistine Chapel of **** up.
What an evil, stupid, little man. To launch a bloody war of aggression, upon a neighbor, for vanity and petty greed, and based on an utterly delusional appraisal of…Jesus, of everything, every single aspect of this morass, the conceited ghoul.
A most definitely incomplete list of Things and People Chessmaster Poot-Poot Disastrously Underestimated: Biden, Zelenksy, NATO, pretty much every single Ukrainian, Zelensky, How Hard War Is Generally, Western unity, Zelensky, Zelensky, Zelensky, and Zelensky.
Stripped, by Wily Joe Biden, of the capacity to justify military aggression with a false flag attack, the best narrative the master manipulator could muster was some feeble sputtering about “de-Nazification,” like a paint-covered kindergartner blaming the dog for the crude treasure map that appeared on the living room carpet.
But the dictator handbook says the bigger the lie, the harder you have to stick to it, so Comrade **** is still trying to gaslight Macron into accepting him as Indiana Jones, socking fascists in the jaw, rather than a crazy old man, working through a war crimes bucket list.
continued below...
6 Mar 2022 3:25 am
continued from above:
You sure did make a Great Man of Volodymyr Zelensky, though. That’s some monkey’s paw **** right there.
Congratulations are clearly in order. You’ve made your currency worthless. Pissed on decades of hard-won good will, business ties…good luck rebuilding those bridges, champ. I see you had to shut down your stock market to keep it from disintegrating to atoms. Damn near every sporting and cultural institution on Earth has severed ties with your overnight pariah state.
And because you’re committing war crimes all over television and the internet, you are manufacturing, in verdant abundance, all the public outrage necessary to guarantee the very outcomes this mess was designed to thwart. Because you’re so intelligent, you see.
NATO is all tight now, dog. Thanks to you. NATO is having sleepovers where everybody talks about who they have crushes on at school, and also how much everybody **** hates you. And there’s a line out the door to join it now, too; to join the European Union and all those other institutions you hoped to scare away from your doorstep.
Nice work.
You sure did make a Great Man of Volodymyr Zelensky, though. That’s some monkey’s paw **** right there.
Congratulations are clearly in order. You’ve made your currency worthless. Pissed on decades of hard-won good will, business ties…good luck rebuilding those bridges, champ. I see you had to shut down your stock market to keep it from disintegrating to atoms. Damn near every sporting and cultural institution on Earth has severed ties with your overnight pariah state.
And because you’re committing war crimes all over television and the internet, you are manufacturing, in verdant abundance, all the public outrage necessary to guarantee the very outcomes this mess was designed to thwart. Because you’re so intelligent, you see.
NATO is all tight now, dog. Thanks to you. NATO is having sleepovers where everybody talks about who they have crushes on at school, and also how much everybody **** hates you. And there’s a line out the door to join it now, too; to join the European Union and all those other institutions you hoped to scare away from your doorstep.
Nice work.
6 Mar 2022 9:29 am
Well...B.See » 06 Mar 2022, 4:19 am » wrote: ↑ You're right. I've never had a real live girlfriend. And according to ohm and others here I'm only a kid, so what the **** would I know about anything ANYWAY.
nefarious101 » 26 Feb 2022, 6:13 am » wrote: ↑
.....B.See is more of a cocksucker than anything else...
In memory of Pumpkins
6 Mar 2022 9:32 am
BV has lost his mind......we can all give ourselves a high five for the assist
6 Mar 2022 10:09 am
That's hysterical! You, the most boring, irrelevant dickhead here who does nothing but deflect everyone else's post attempting to call someone else "boring"!Blackvegetable » 31 Jan 2022, 10:45 am » wrote: ↑ That's one thing you've never managed.
Being interesting.
Next time you get the urge to do so, just look in the mirror, you worthless turd!
14 Mar 2022 10:42 pm
ahem... these pitiful trolls make me laugh sometimes. They're RANK amateurs, mind you. But they TRY.
MEANWHILE, THE LATEST GEMS FROM THE SHOWER CAP BLOG:
At Home & Abroad, Gaslighting Fascists Piss in the World’s Cheerios - Shower Cap Blog
EXCERPTS:
"... like a Newsmax junkie demanding ivermectin during his intubation, Putin somehow still believes he can gaslight his way out of objective reality, because apparently lessons in the limits of propaganda have to be learned the hard way. Feeble squawking about “denazification” continues, though I’d wager Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov’s lunatic assertion that Russia “did not attack Ukraine” would be contested by the folks digging the mass graves.
The newest, biggest lie implies that the United States could imagine no better location for a bioweapons laboratory* than a few short miles from the Russian border, an assertion so asinine you’d discard it with a chuckle if it didn’t likely portend Putin’s plans for a chemical attack of his own.
Tucker Carlson, no doubt fearing his substantial investment in Eurotrash autocracy would turn permanently sour, jumped allllll over that choice bit of ****, hoping to gently guide his rube audience back to 21st Century Hitler’s corner, because, well, if white nationalists aren’t allowed to seize whatever they want through violence, what’s the **** point of Tucker Carlson?
Donald Trump, who, even with Sean Hannity setting the softballs up on a goddamn t-ball tee, couldn’t quite bring himself to condemn the Butcher of Mariupol. And folks, that’s because this is exactly what he himself is after;
he wants to get back to the -residency so he can start killing and killing and killing, until there’s no one left with the audacity to remind him he’s a loser. It’s all he’s asked Santa for since 2020. Here in these Divided States, the radical Right persists in its own relentless shelling of basic human decency.
continued below....
MEANWHILE, THE LATEST GEMS FROM THE SHOWER CAP BLOG:
At Home & Abroad, Gaslighting Fascists Piss in the World’s Cheerios - Shower Cap Blog
EXCERPTS:
"... like a Newsmax junkie demanding ivermectin during his intubation, Putin somehow still believes he can gaslight his way out of objective reality, because apparently lessons in the limits of propaganda have to be learned the hard way. Feeble squawking about “denazification” continues, though I’d wager Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov’s lunatic assertion that Russia “did not attack Ukraine” would be contested by the folks digging the mass graves.
The newest, biggest lie implies that the United States could imagine no better location for a bioweapons laboratory* than a few short miles from the Russian border, an assertion so asinine you’d discard it with a chuckle if it didn’t likely portend Putin’s plans for a chemical attack of his own.
Tucker Carlson, no doubt fearing his substantial investment in Eurotrash autocracy would turn permanently sour, jumped allllll over that choice bit of ****, hoping to gently guide his rube audience back to 21st Century Hitler’s corner, because, well, if white nationalists aren’t allowed to seize whatever they want through violence, what’s the **** point of Tucker Carlson?
Donald Trump, who, even with Sean Hannity setting the softballs up on a goddamn t-ball tee, couldn’t quite bring himself to condemn the Butcher of Mariupol. And folks, that’s because this is exactly what he himself is after;
he wants to get back to the -residency so he can start killing and killing and killing, until there’s no one left with the audacity to remind him he’s a loser. It’s all he’s asked Santa for since 2020. Here in these Divided States, the radical Right persists in its own relentless shelling of basic human decency.
continued below....
14 Mar 2022 10:45 pm
continued from above:
Florida Republicans advanced their vile Don’t Say Gay bill, which serves no positive purpose, but increases the suffering of LGBTQ children, and thus, the delight of the hate-crazed minority that dominates right-wing politics. It’s amazing, how much of what passes for conservative policy these days is ultimately just spite porn for bigots.
Exactly like their Russian counterparts, these malevolent buttpimples justify their barbarity with twisted, victim-blaming lies, viciously suggesting that merely informing children that some folks are gay amounts to “grooming.”
And once again, Tucker Carlson uses this trash to unsubtly nudge his audience, the largest on cable, towards violence, which, he casually suggests, is simply a “normal person’s” response.
…and that’s How It Happens Here.
Florida Republicans advanced their vile Don’t Say Gay bill, which serves no positive purpose, but increases the suffering of LGBTQ children, and thus, the delight of the hate-crazed minority that dominates right-wing politics. It’s amazing, how much of what passes for conservative policy these days is ultimately just spite porn for bigots.
Exactly like their Russian counterparts, these malevolent buttpimples justify their barbarity with twisted, victim-blaming lies, viciously suggesting that merely informing children that some folks are gay amounts to “grooming.”
And once again, Tucker Carlson uses this trash to unsubtly nudge his audience, the largest on cable, towards violence, which, he casually suggests, is simply a “normal person’s” response.
…and that’s How It Happens Here.
14 Mar 2022 10:49 pm
There is a boat in our marina named lan yap. It's a cold-molded Carolina custom. Probably 1.5 to 2m boat.
Very nice lovely offshore battlewagon.
Very nice lovely offshore battlewagon.
14 Mar 2022 10:57 pm
Thanks for that tidbit of info. Here's something more:A lagniappe is "a small gift given to a customer by a merchant at the time of a purchase" (such as a 13th doughnut on purchase of a dozen), or more broadly, "something given or obtained gratuitously or by way of good measure." It can be used more generally as meaning any extra or unexpected benefit. The word entered English from the Louisiana French adapting a Quechua word brought in to New Orleans by the Spanish Creoles.
(source: wikipedia)
(source: wikipedia)
14 Mar 2022 11:24 pm
Wow, thanks. Born and raised on the Gulf Coast and have lived in NOLA, that is news to me.B.See » 14 Mar 2022, 10:57 pm » wrote: ↑ Thanks for that tidbit of info. Here's something more:A lagniappe is "a small gift given to a customer by a merchant at the time of a purchase" (such as a 13th doughnut on purchase of a dozen), or more broadly, "something given or obtained gratuitously or by way of good measure." It can be used more generally as meaning any extra or unexpected benefit. The word entered English from the Louisiana French adapting a Quechua word brought in to New Orleans by the Spanish Creoles.
(source: wikipedia)
snicker.
You didn't know it was pronounced lan yap.
14 Mar 2022 11:58 pm
Well, how would I know? No need to get your panties in a wad.crimsongulf » 14 Mar 2022, 11:24 pm » wrote: ↑ Wow, thanks. Born and raised on the Gulf Coast and have lived in NOLA, that is news to me.
snicker.
You didn't know it was pronounced lan yap.
Was the name of a restaurant, I think. I always thought the word was comical. And as such, its meaning, well suited to the tongue-in-cheek nature and sheer genius of the author's (Shower Cap) blog.
Plain UNMITIGATED TRUTH... with a dose of syrup. imo.
20 Mar 2022 10:22 am
The latest from the Cap:
In Putin’s Russia, War Crimes Commit YOU! - Shower Cap Blog
excerpts (I'll prolly have to post this in two parts):
"Russia’s absurd, flaccid war rages madly on, as Vladimir “How Hard Can War Be, Really” Putin, cornered like the dumbest of all possible rats, frantically attempts to project strength from his turd throne atop one of history’s greatest blunders.
The locals steadfastly refuse to treat Vlad’s **** brigade as he’d anticipated and planned, unless of course the traditional Ukrainian folk greeting for liberators involves slaughtering them in great numbers.
At least 7,000 Russian troops have met their ends in this **** already, exceeding in three short weeks the total number of American deaths from two decades in Afghanistan and Iraq put together, and those little excursions were hardly models of efficiency, y’know?
Still, like any good right-wing fanatic, Pootie Tang has sought solace from the less convenient aspects of objective reality in the lovin’ arms of a meticulously maintained disinformation bubble, within which he glides from triumph to triumph, over legions of Nazis (Jewish ones, apparently) and their U.S.-backed chemical weapons labs.
With precious few lingering allies, (likely on account of all the mass murder) the Kremlin would no doubt love to send chocolates n’ roses to the handful of accommodating propagandists remaining on the American ultra-right, for helpfully platforming this latest Big Lie, but, y’know…sanctions.
In Putin’s Russia, War Crimes Commit YOU! - Shower Cap Blog
excerpts (I'll prolly have to post this in two parts):
"Russia’s absurd, flaccid war rages madly on, as Vladimir “How Hard Can War Be, Really” Putin, cornered like the dumbest of all possible rats, frantically attempts to project strength from his turd throne atop one of history’s greatest blunders.
The locals steadfastly refuse to treat Vlad’s **** brigade as he’d anticipated and planned, unless of course the traditional Ukrainian folk greeting for liberators involves slaughtering them in great numbers.
At least 7,000 Russian troops have met their ends in this **** already, exceeding in three short weeks the total number of American deaths from two decades in Afghanistan and Iraq put together, and those little excursions were hardly models of efficiency, y’know?
Still, like any good right-wing fanatic, Pootie Tang has sought solace from the less convenient aspects of objective reality in the lovin’ arms of a meticulously maintained disinformation bubble, within which he glides from triumph to triumph, over legions of Nazis (Jewish ones, apparently) and their U.S.-backed chemical weapons labs.
With precious few lingering allies, (likely on account of all the mass murder) the Kremlin would no doubt love to send chocolates n’ roses to the handful of accommodating propagandists remaining on the American ultra-right, for helpfully platforming this latest Big Lie, but, y’know…sanctions.
20 Mar 2022 10:24 am
continued from above:
Of course, Tucker Carlson and his ilk are merely trying to recoup some of their massive investment in Russia’s autocracy; I’m sure it’s frustrating, laying all that groundwork for a white nationalist police state of your very own, only to watch the whole enterprise blow up, like a residential building full of innocent civilians.
The holdouts who remain pro-Putin in the face of three solid weeks of nonstop war crimes are the genuine dregs of Trumpism, the absolute bastards who’ve been itching for violence their whole damn lives, and they’re furious and bewildered that the world turned on their guy over a measly few hundred dead children.
You’ve got Candace Owens stumbling around, shrieking “Russian lives matter,” while usefulish idiot Madison Cawthorn’s own party plots his defenestration.
Liar Tuck himself whines about being labeled “an organ of Russian disinformation,” while simultaneously parroting Putin’s talking points nightly.
Then there’s onetime Delaware Senate candidate Lauren Witzke, who praises Putin’s “Christian values,” when she’s not interviewing skeevy creeps who say things like, “women are our currency to be bartered and traded.” I forget, what did Jesus say about shelling hospitals again? Or, for that matter, WOMEN AS “CURRENCY?”
Meanwhile, Koch Industries refuses to stop financing Vlad’s war machine, because while this whole “Ukraine” thing is a shame and all, the real sin would be if the billionaire Koch family heirs were denied even a nickel’s worth of their beloved blood money.
Since “Republican Congressman” amounts to an entry-level position in the Koch organization, understanding how American political culture wound up so utterly **** is deceptively simple, don’t you think?
Of course, Tucker Carlson and his ilk are merely trying to recoup some of their massive investment in Russia’s autocracy; I’m sure it’s frustrating, laying all that groundwork for a white nationalist police state of your very own, only to watch the whole enterprise blow up, like a residential building full of innocent civilians.
The holdouts who remain pro-Putin in the face of three solid weeks of nonstop war crimes are the genuine dregs of Trumpism, the absolute bastards who’ve been itching for violence their whole damn lives, and they’re furious and bewildered that the world turned on their guy over a measly few hundred dead children.
You’ve got Candace Owens stumbling around, shrieking “Russian lives matter,” while usefulish idiot Madison Cawthorn’s own party plots his defenestration.
Liar Tuck himself whines about being labeled “an organ of Russian disinformation,” while simultaneously parroting Putin’s talking points nightly.
Then there’s onetime Delaware Senate candidate Lauren Witzke, who praises Putin’s “Christian values,” when she’s not interviewing skeevy creeps who say things like, “women are our currency to be bartered and traded.” I forget, what did Jesus say about shelling hospitals again? Or, for that matter, WOMEN AS “CURRENCY?”
Meanwhile, Koch Industries refuses to stop financing Vlad’s war machine, because while this whole “Ukraine” thing is a shame and all, the real sin would be if the billionaire Koch family heirs were denied even a nickel’s worth of their beloved blood money.
Since “Republican Congressman” amounts to an entry-level position in the Koch organization, understanding how American political culture wound up so utterly **** is deceptively simple, don’t you think?
27 Mar 2022 2:34 am
Remind Me Again, Mr. Putin, What Happens When We **** Around? - Shower Cap Blog
First part of this weeks Shower Cap Blog had to do with Putin. But I'll be skipping that part.
EXCERPTS:
Well, the "Ye Gods Look Upon the Fallen State of American Conservatism Pageant," excuse me, “Ketanji Brown Jackson’s Supreme Court confirmation hearing,” went more or less exactly how you knew it would…hour upon hour of the cringiest imaginable posturing from the dullest assholes on the planet, as they competed for the affections of an attention span-challenged hate cult.
Master sleuth Josh Hawley uncovered the Democratic Party’s nefarious court-packing plot to elevate the rights of child pornographers above all others. That’s right, Josh, QAnon is 100% real, and the endgame involves putting pedophiles in ultimate charge of just who has to bake whose cakes. Roy Moore is totally down with that plan, by the way. So is Matt Gaetz. And Josh Duggar. And Ruben Verastigui. And Adam Hageman. And Ralph Shortey.
But sure, this is a huge problem…for the Left. Sure.
Or, and bear with me, maybe Josh Hawley is an awkwardly stitched together wad of surgically removed colon tumors, intentionally spreading disinformation that’s widely understood to provoke violence, because he’s a fascist working to burn American democracy down in order to piss in the ashes.
As for Hawley’s distinguished Judiciary Committee colleagues…oh, **** hell, do I really have to catalog all this crap? What is it about a SCOTUS confirmation that makes these clowns waggle their subpar asses at the world so aggressively?
Like, why did Marsha Blackburn feel it necessary to randomly demonstrate her inability to pass a fifth grade social studies test? WHY?
What made Lindsey Graham wave his soiled trousers so proudly before the assembled cameras?
Why in seven hells did Ted Cruz think Racist Story Time With My **** Beard would benefit him in any way?
What meth-addled beetle burrowed into Mike Braun’s brain and told him to take an unprompted shot at interracial marriage?
What is in the goddamn water over there, kids?
CONTINUED BELOW:
First part of this weeks Shower Cap Blog had to do with Putin. But I'll be skipping that part.
EXCERPTS:
Well, the "Ye Gods Look Upon the Fallen State of American Conservatism Pageant," excuse me, “Ketanji Brown Jackson’s Supreme Court confirmation hearing,” went more or less exactly how you knew it would…hour upon hour of the cringiest imaginable posturing from the dullest assholes on the planet, as they competed for the affections of an attention span-challenged hate cult.
Master sleuth Josh Hawley uncovered the Democratic Party’s nefarious court-packing plot to elevate the rights of child pornographers above all others. That’s right, Josh, QAnon is 100% real, and the endgame involves putting pedophiles in ultimate charge of just who has to bake whose cakes. Roy Moore is totally down with that plan, by the way. So is Matt Gaetz. And Josh Duggar. And Ruben Verastigui. And Adam Hageman. And Ralph Shortey.
But sure, this is a huge problem…for the Left. Sure.
Or, and bear with me, maybe Josh Hawley is an awkwardly stitched together wad of surgically removed colon tumors, intentionally spreading disinformation that’s widely understood to provoke violence, because he’s a fascist working to burn American democracy down in order to piss in the ashes.
As for Hawley’s distinguished Judiciary Committee colleagues…oh, **** hell, do I really have to catalog all this crap? What is it about a SCOTUS confirmation that makes these clowns waggle their subpar asses at the world so aggressively?
Like, why did Marsha Blackburn feel it necessary to randomly demonstrate her inability to pass a fifth grade social studies test? WHY?
What made Lindsey Graham wave his soiled trousers so proudly before the assembled cameras?
Why in seven hells did Ted Cruz think Racist Story Time With My **** Beard would benefit him in any way?
What meth-addled beetle burrowed into Mike Braun’s brain and told him to take an unprompted shot at interracial marriage?
What is in the goddamn water over there, kids?
CONTINUED BELOW:
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