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A Giggles Thread: Jokes, Cartoons, Parody, Satire, Sarcasm & Irony
22 Aug 2017 2:10 pm
WONKETTE ALERT!
Because after all, a hottie like him can't be seen with an old hag like that on his arm.
This is the wife (who gave him 3 beautiful children) that he traded in for the newer model.Trump Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin’s Wife Lets Her Gigantic Asshole Flag Fly!
Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin and Louise Linton got married 59 days ago.
Look, a picture of their glamorous wedding! The happy couple is flanked by Donald and Melon Trump, and Mike and Mother Pence.
As Vanity Fair notes, it was a very fancy schmancy affair.
Mnuchin, after all, is a Goldman Sachs/Hollywood creature from the very swamp Trump promised to drain, which means he’s gotta lotta dolla dolla bills, y’all.
Fast forward to this week, and we see that Linton has settled comfortably into her role as a total **** asshole married to a total **** asshole who works for Donald Trump.
Linton posted an Instagram pic of herself hopping off a US American government plane, and made sure to #hashtag all the brands she was wearing because otherwise we would have assumed she got it all at Kohl’s:
Unsurprisingly, a woman on the internet saw this and was like “I see you, Marie Antoinette,” so she replied, “Glad we could pay for your little getaway. #deplorable.”
This did not sit well with the Duchess of Mnuchin!
Here is your screenshot, since Linton has now made her InstaFace private:
We must cut in and remind everyone that they got married FIFTY-NINE DAYS AGO.
She must have done a metric **** of self-sacrificing herself for America in the LITERAL WEEKS she has been married to the fugly-*** Treasury secretary.
She probably wears Old Navy on Fridays, to show everybody she’s jes’ folks.
Whether she leaves the house in such pauper threads, we do not know.
Maybe she just throws them on to sit at the kitchen counter in her 16,000 square foot, $12.6 million Massachusetts Avenue Heights mansion and do her weekly coupon-clipping, because she’s such a normal, in-touch American.
Dialing Melania on her flip-phone, she may even be known to exclaim, “Girl there is a SALE at the Big Lots, and then it is UNLIMITED BREADSTICKS-THIRTY at the Olive Garden. You in?!?! Lolol EMOJI.”
Linton added:
She also said the poster’s peasant life looked “cute.”
And the choir replied, “CHRIST, what an asshole!”
As HuffPost’s Yashar Ali points out, Linton has acted like a foolish dickhead before, even before her many weeks of devotion to Steven Mnuchin, Donald Trump, and Making America Great Again:
Surprised she didn’t just send a mean girl Instagram message to Zambians asking if they even know how totally ruined her #ToryBurch sandals were after her excursion to the country.
How ungrateful!
She could have used the hashtag #AllCoutureMatters.
Oh well, #MissedOpportunities.
Because after all, a hottie like him can't be seen with an old hag like that on his arm.