Liberal Forum

Blackvegetable » Today, 9:55 am » wrote: ↑

Today, 9:55 am

As an accomplished narcissist, I must proudly proclaim that answering questions is beneath me, facts are optional, and every loss magically transforms into a "win" the moment I quote myself like it’s scripture. Therefore, it is with my great dishonor to accept the Lifetime Dodge Master Award.

My acceptance speech:
Thank you, thank you.

As an accomplished narcissist and world-class evader, I humbly — no, proudly — accept this award.I would like to thank my crippling fear of direct answers, my obsessive devotion to copy/pasting, and my personal thesaurus, which makes me sound smarter even when I’m panicking.A special thanks goes to the 130 questions I skillfully dodged — each one a brick in the towering cathedral of my cowardice.Without my patented ‘deflect, demand, dodge, and declare victory’ technique, none of this would have been possible.To my fellow narcissists: remember, when cornered, quote your opponent, call them stupid, and run. Works every time.And finally, I'd like to say to all my critics... you're welcome. You got to witness true mastery.