Liberal Forum

Skans: Dude, you were so right, communists are taking over America. 

J. Edgar: Skans, I tried to tell everyone, when you come face-to-face with a conspiracy so monstrous you cannot believe it exists. The American mind still has not come to a realization of the evil which has been introduced into our midst. It rejects even the assumption that human creatures could espouse a philosophy which must ultimately destroy all that is good and decent.

Skans: We were always taught that it was the Russian Communists that wanted to take our country away from us.

J. Edgar: The Communist threat from without is there.  However, it is nothing compared to the Communist threat from within. The latter is reaching into the very heart of America through its espionage agents and a cunning, defiant, and lawless communist party, which is fanatically dedicated to the Marxist cause of world enslavement and destruction of the foundations of our republic.

Skans:  DAMN, J. Edgar, you were so prophetic, what's the root cause of this Communist evil?

J. Edgar:  Red Diaper Babies who's parents immigrated from Eastern Europe. No amount of law enforcement can solve a problem that goes back to the family. They had un-American beliefs.  Also, their children were children of of latchkey parents, and as such became juvenile delinquents, hypnotized by the false promises of Marxism.  There is but one way to eliminate juvenile delinquency - that is by providing each child in America with competent parents, even if that means replacing their sick communist parents.

Skans: Were you watching what Joe Biden did to America? What's your main take-away on him?

J. Edgar:  The absence of Truth-telling.  Joe Biden has always been a liar. On his demise, I have word that the Powers that Be will teach him to tell the truth. Truth-telling, I have found, is the key to responsible citizenship. The thousands of criminals I have seen in 40 years of law enforcement have had one thing in common: Every single one was a liar.

Well, thank you Mr. Hoover.  This has been an enlightening interview. I'm going to let you sign off for now, but I may have some more questions for you.