11 Feb 2023 11:01 am
But in conservative politics, the loudest asshole is King. Speaking of which… 
The hardest part of writing about Elon Musk is the constant need to find fresh synonyms for “pathetic.” The man is on a cringe bender, hemorrhaging credibility and billions of dollars as he stomps his way down the well-worn path trod by every mewling MAGA mediocrity that just. won’t. shut. the. ****. up.
There’s nothing in the world more tedious than a freshly blackpilled dude. That desperation to paper over personal failings with conspiracy theories and victimhood…nobody wants to go to that party, Elon. Nobody that doesn’t suck, anyway. “Groomer rhetoric and replacement-level ****, BYOB.” Ah jeez, as amusing as it’s been, watching you wiggle your *** for likes from the Q crowd, I’ve, uh, got a thing that night.
But congratulations on discovering pronoun jokes, kid. You’re right on the cutting edge. I bet you shout “Lerooooooy Jenkins” every time you have to sell another brick of Tesla stock. You’re the hippest cat in class, you only get booed when you appear in public because everybody’s jealous of how awesome you are.
I mean, who doesn’t love a really rank hypocrite? Self-Professed “Free Speech Absolutist” Deplatforms Journalists Who Cover Him, you say? Insufferable Twit Whines About Doxxing Days After Former Employee Flees Home From Twit-Sicced Mob? What a walking skidmark you are, Elon. Pay your bills, dickwad.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure smiting critics on the social media site you paid the full rube markup rate for provides a nice respite from failing in front of the whole **** world, but it only feeds the loser doom loop you’re trapped in. Pro tip: people won’t stop laughing at you until you stop punching yourself in the groin.
I hope Mark Meadows’ phone winds up in the Smithsonian, y’know? I’m told that if you hold it in your hands, you can almost hear the institutions of democracy rotting. Personally, I think the writers are getting a little heavy-handed with the “Marshall Law” stuff and the NFTs and the vaccine quackery; like, ok you guys, they’re idiots, WE GET IT.
The Marshall Law guy is South Carolina Congressdolt Ralph Norman, who is also in the news this week as one of the five intractable turds floating in Kevin McCarthy’s breakfast cereal, (he’s only got a four-vote margin to work with, y’see) which is degoddamnlightful, if you ask me. Live by the insurrectionist weirdo, die by the insurrectionist weirdo, ****.
I guess Brett Kavanaugh attended the creepiest of all possible Xmas parties, but don’t worry, he responsibly brought along his designated apologist, Susan Collins, to excuse/enable any drunken assaults that may h
The hardest part of writing about Elon Musk is the constant need to find fresh synonyms for “pathetic.” The man is on a cringe bender, hemorrhaging credibility and billions of dollars as he stomps his way down the well-worn path trod by every mewling MAGA mediocrity that just. won’t. shut. the. ****. up.
There’s nothing in the world more tedious than a freshly blackpilled dude. That desperation to paper over personal failings with conspiracy theories and victimhood…nobody wants to go to that party, Elon. Nobody that doesn’t suck, anyway. “Groomer rhetoric and replacement-level ****, BYOB.” Ah jeez, as amusing as it’s been, watching you wiggle your *** for likes from the Q crowd, I’ve, uh, got a thing that night.
But congratulations on discovering pronoun jokes, kid. You’re right on the cutting edge. I bet you shout “Lerooooooy Jenkins” every time you have to sell another brick of Tesla stock. You’re the hippest cat in class, you only get booed when you appear in public because everybody’s jealous of how awesome you are.
I mean, who doesn’t love a really rank hypocrite? Self-Professed “Free Speech Absolutist” Deplatforms Journalists Who Cover Him, you say? Insufferable Twit Whines About Doxxing Days After Former Employee Flees Home From Twit-Sicced Mob? What a walking skidmark you are, Elon. Pay your bills, dickwad.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure smiting critics on the social media site you paid the full rube markup rate for provides a nice respite from failing in front of the whole **** world, but it only feeds the loser doom loop you’re trapped in. Pro tip: people won’t stop laughing at you until you stop punching yourself in the groin.
I hope Mark Meadows’ phone winds up in the Smithsonian, y’know? I’m told that if you hold it in your hands, you can almost hear the institutions of democracy rotting. Personally, I think the writers are getting a little heavy-handed with the “Marshall Law” stuff and the NFTs and the vaccine quackery; like, ok you guys, they’re idiots, WE GET IT.
The Marshall Law guy is South Carolina Congressdolt Ralph Norman, who is also in the news this week as one of the five intractable turds floating in Kevin McCarthy’s breakfast cereal, (he’s only got a four-vote margin to work with, y’see) which is degoddamnlightful, if you ask me. Live by the insurrectionist weirdo, die by the insurrectionist weirdo, ****.
I guess Brett Kavanaugh attended the creepiest of all possible Xmas parties, but don’t worry, he responsibly brought along his designated apologist, Susan Collins, to excuse/enable any drunken assaults that may h