27 Mar 2022 2:34 am
Remind Me Again, Mr. Putin, What Happens When We **** Around? - Shower Cap Blog
First part of this weeks Shower Cap Blog had to do with Putin. But I'll be skipping that part.
EXCERPTS:
Well, the "Ye Gods Look Upon the Fallen State of American Conservatism Pageant," excuse me, “Ketanji Brown Jackson’s Supreme Court confirmation hearing,” went more or less exactly how you knew it would…hour upon hour of the cringiest imaginable posturing from the dullest assholes on the planet, as they competed for the affections of an attention span-challenged hate cult.
Master sleuth Josh Hawley uncovered the Democratic Party’s nefarious court-packing plot to elevate the rights of child pornographers above all others. That’s right, Josh, QAnon is 100% real, and the endgame involves putting pedophiles in ultimate charge of just who has to bake whose cakes. Roy Moore is totally down with that plan, by the way. So is Matt Gaetz. And Josh Duggar. And Ruben Verastigui. And Adam Hageman. And Ralph Shortey.
But sure, this is a huge problem…for the Left. Sure.
Or, and bear with me, maybe Josh Hawley is an awkwardly stitched together wad of surgically removed colon tumors, intentionally spreading disinformation that’s widely understood to provoke violence, because he’s a fascist working to burn American democracy down in order to piss in the ashes.
As for Hawley’s distinguished Judiciary Committee colleagues…oh, **** hell, do I really have to catalog all this crap? What is it about a SCOTUS confirmation that makes these clowns waggle their subpar asses at the world so aggressively?
Like, why did Marsha Blackburn feel it necessary to randomly demonstrate her inability to pass a fifth grade social studies test? WHY?
What made Lindsey Graham wave his soiled trousers so proudly before the assembled cameras?
Why in seven hells did Ted Cruz think Racist Story Time With My **** Beard would benefit him in any way?
What meth-addled beetle burrowed into Mike Braun’s brain and told him to take an unprompted shot at interracial marriage?
What is in the goddamn water over there, kids?
CONTINUED BELOW:
First part of this weeks Shower Cap Blog had to do with Putin. But I'll be skipping that part.
EXCERPTS:
Well, the "Ye Gods Look Upon the Fallen State of American Conservatism Pageant," excuse me, “Ketanji Brown Jackson’s Supreme Court confirmation hearing,” went more or less exactly how you knew it would…hour upon hour of the cringiest imaginable posturing from the dullest assholes on the planet, as they competed for the affections of an attention span-challenged hate cult.
Master sleuth Josh Hawley uncovered the Democratic Party’s nefarious court-packing plot to elevate the rights of child pornographers above all others. That’s right, Josh, QAnon is 100% real, and the endgame involves putting pedophiles in ultimate charge of just who has to bake whose cakes. Roy Moore is totally down with that plan, by the way. So is Matt Gaetz. And Josh Duggar. And Ruben Verastigui. And Adam Hageman. And Ralph Shortey.
But sure, this is a huge problem…for the Left. Sure.
Or, and bear with me, maybe Josh Hawley is an awkwardly stitched together wad of surgically removed colon tumors, intentionally spreading disinformation that’s widely understood to provoke violence, because he’s a fascist working to burn American democracy down in order to piss in the ashes.
As for Hawley’s distinguished Judiciary Committee colleagues…oh, **** hell, do I really have to catalog all this crap? What is it about a SCOTUS confirmation that makes these clowns waggle their subpar asses at the world so aggressively?
Like, why did Marsha Blackburn feel it necessary to randomly demonstrate her inability to pass a fifth grade social studies test? WHY?
What made Lindsey Graham wave his soiled trousers so proudly before the assembled cameras?
Why in seven hells did Ted Cruz think Racist Story Time With My **** Beard would benefit him in any way?
What meth-addled beetle burrowed into Mike Braun’s brain and told him to take an unprompted shot at interracial marriage?
What is in the goddamn water over there, kids?
CONTINUED BELOW: